I am a WOMAN

I shave my legs,

I sit down to pee.

And I can justify any shopping spree.

Don't go to a barber, but a beauty salon.

I can get a massage without a hard-on.

I can balance the checkbook,

I can pump my own gas.

I Can talk to my friends about the size of my ass

My beauty's a masterpiece and yes, it takes long.

At least I can admit to others when I'm wrong.

I don't drive in circles, at any cost.

I don't have a problem admitting I'm lost.

I never forget an important date.

You just gotta deal with it, I'm usually late.

I don't watch movies with lots of gore.

Don't need instant replay to remember the score.

I won't lose my hair, I don't get jock itch.

And just cause I'm assertive, Don't call me a bitch.

Don't say to your friends, oh yeah, I can get her.
In your dreams, my dear, I can do better!

Flowers are okay,
But jewelry's best.

Look at me you idiot...
Not at my chest !!!

I don't have a problem,

With expressing my feelings.

I know when you're lying,
You look at the ceiling.

DON'T call me a GIRL,
a BABE or a CHICK.

I am a WOMAN.
Get it, you DICK!?!

Un poema para todos los patanes del mundo que desgraciadamente de vez en cuando cruzan nuestro camino.